I'm so Thankful that I have three incredibly strong women models in my Grandmothers. I had a beautiful Grandma Laura that I lost several years ago. I'm lucky that my Grandma Didi is still with us - and I get to video chat with her.
A few weeks ago was the 4th Anniversary of my Grandma Quigg's passing. My cousin Charlie sent an email to our group of about a dozen cousins and my aunts and uncles saying he was thinking of the old gal. This started a back and forth amongst the multi-generational group with little funny and moving memories about Grandma.
Now, Grandma Quigg came into my life when I was 2 1/2 and moved to the US. She never once made me feel like anything other than her flesh and blood. I have a big warm beautiful family in Brazil that I miss dearly, but she created this big warm group here in the US and I was so lucky to get brought into.
I loved all the exhange amongst my family I had to share it here.
Remembering a great lady on the 4th anniversary of Gramma’s passing. I’ll sing into a flashlight in her honor. - Charlie Quigg
Perfect. I will eat Wheat Thins and say something cheeky and then winkingly act like I have no idea why people are laughing. - Stephanie Monaghan
While making dinner tonight I will boil water longer so it stays hotter longer. - Jeffrey Quigg
I will print out this email after sending it and mail it to you. I want to make sure you get it. - Laura Fisher
When in doubt, bring pie. - Jeffrey Quigg
Bring one pie, but buy a couple more for yourself. - Jane Baker
Get a spiral cut ham for a party, spend the rest of the night guarding it so you have some to take home.- Matthew Quigg
If said ham falls while you are trying to eat it just call whatever dog is nearby to eat it "benji!!!!" - Daniela Almeida [We have Super8 video of this happening]
For Christmas buy everyone gifts from Lillian Vernon- also give them some change so everyone gets the same value "here's a pencil with your name on it and $1.35 because Stephanie's pencil was a little more expensive - Daniela Almeida
I loved her concern for treating everyone the same. Except that year she gave Peter more than the rest of us and Daniela said she would represent the rest of the grandkids in a class-action lawsuit. - Stephanie Monaghan
I’m sure there was a really good reason for it. So back to the spiral ham comment………..I remember her being concerned with how and why they put the bone inside the ham. - Peter Ewen
The bone-in ham Christmas was the first time Shaun met her. He loved her immediately. But she nearly slapped his hand when he went in for seconds on that thing. - Stephanie Monaghan
Speaking of equity, the neatest story I heard about Gramma was when she stood up for our neighbor who had a verbally abusive husband. Long story short, Gramma stared the husband down and put him in his place, got the wife into her house and sent the husband home with his tail between his legs. You didn’t mess with PMQ. - Charlie Quigg
I remember this. I was very proud of mom over this one. - Kathy Quigg
One thing I have to say is she was very generous not only with her family but with the community as well. She didn't do it for the recognition, she did it because it was the right thing to do. I think she had at one point a book fund at Grays Harbor College for students to get their books paid for. I even think she did it in her sister's name. - Jeffrey Quigg
There are actually two book funds in Jerry Orkney's name. One at Grays Harbor College and another at Peninsula College. They are no interest loans. (Jerry wanted it that way to help "responsible students that were trying to stay in school.") - Tom Quigg
I think it’ very interesting that all four of her kids and all 10 of her grandkids share a trait she had in bucket-fulls: we are all “connectors”. We all value, make, and maintain connections to others easily and we are all ready to accept a new person without conditions, while still having boundaries. The more I have worked with kids and their families, I have come to realize that what is natural for us is not for too many people. - Stephanie Monaghan
Any grandchild during the holidays: Grandma, do you want a glass of wine or a cup of coffee?? Grandma: I'll take a Busch Light! - Steve Quigg
I was reading all of these back an forth emails to my co-worker and we were cry-laughing and another co-worker came into my office and said "Oh shoot, I was coming in here to tell you something, but I forgot what it was. Must have been a lie." GRANDMA SAID THAT ALL THE TIME. So creepy - she is totally hearing us! And she approves.
This Thanksgiving - my cousins, aunts and uncles aren't all together like we used to be. I do get one brother and his family to be with. But am still Thankfully connected to this wonderful group.
My brother had this read at her memorial. I kept it and am reprinting it here for all to enjoy:
I have 2 grandmothers, both lived thousands of miles apart, different backgrounds, different languages, different circumstances. One thing is true about grandmothers though. Whenever I would visit with them, they both would hold my hand and hang on to every word I had to say.
When she had her hearing I would call grandma on a regular basis and talk with her. The past few years she started most conversations with how amazing it was that Matt ran into Gail and Bett Quigg in the middle of NYC. When she had something she found interesting she always felt compelled to share it. Whether it was something you wanted to hear or something you need to hear or something she felt needed repeating. That is is one thing I have tried to not only do, but have the tact in which to do it. May make life a little easier being honest not only with myself but with others.
She had interesting theories on life and some science. For example if you boiled water it stayed hotter longer. I work with some PhD's and I asked one of them if that was possible. They explained that the universe is so complex that anything is possible. Given our current surroundings that not yet have they figured out the formula for boiling water to keep it hotter longer. She is probably ahead of her time.
She was also a fiery woman. Had a lot of passion for life, I have seen her laugh until she had an accident. I have also seen her so upset her eyes lit up like fire. I remember when my dad told grandma she had to quit smoking. I was pretty sure my dad's life was about to be cut short. I also remember my mom having to hold her back when she got mad at her sister for wanting to move back to Sequim.
Of all the things I have learned from her throughout my years some things are certain. Honesty is the best policy, laugh early and often and it is amazing that Gail and Bett Quigg ran into Matt in the middle of NYC.
She was a lot to all of us. A mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, mother in law, sister in law, aunt, neighbor and friend. I will miss my friend so very much. Good bye Grandma Pat, may you rest in peace.
Jeff
I didn't get to be at her memorial, but I did get to see her the week before she passed. She was pretty exhausted by this point and hadn't spoken if several days. When we walked in the room, her eyes lit up and she said "Amelia" when she saw the two of us walk in the room. She LOVED her grandkids so much. Amelia's name was the only thing she said while we were there that day. She just stared and smiled so much at her.
I hope this share makes you all smile a little too.
